


Seasoned

by gulpereel



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Alcohol, Growing Up, M/M, Mentions of Sex, Minor Character Death, Spoilers in second half
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-08
Updated: 2017-01-18
Packaged: 2018-09-15 17:27:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9248069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gulpereel/pseuds/gulpereel
Summary: Ignis Scientia grows up and learns about the world around him and the relationships he's built within it. Will contain spoilers for the entire game.





	1. Cinnamon

**Author's Note:**

> I shouldn't start writing at 5am but that's just life and I don't think i'll ever get anything beta read. I wanted to make an Ignis/Gladio fic that explores Ignis's life in my interpretations of canon timelines that I figured out from the game, anime, the prologue story and any extra information I could find. I changed a couple of things that I felt didn't make 100% sense though and also made it gayer clearly. I'm splitting it into two parts cause I need to sleep and the second part will have all the spoilers. If you wanna discuss anything hit me up at @gulpereelcos on twitter!

Ignis's first crush is at the delicate age of 11 and it's a silly, childish thing on a Crownsguard soldier. He can't remember the mans face well or his name but he knew he was young and fresh to the citadel workers. They hadn't really spoken much but when they had, Ignis felt listened to, beamed at the way this guard seemed interested in things that Noctis didn't. It's not like he disliked the prince for not caring, he knew people would have different tastes but that's what made these brief conversations special. 

Unfortunately, remembering his first crush also leaves a slightly bitter after taste as it was the same year that Marilith had attacked the royal family and Ignis felt panic he'd never felt before as he heard Noctis was injured. Wasn't he suppose to help protect the prince? Why wasn't he allowed to see Noct straight away? He could answer those questions now as an adult but even being a smart 11 year old still meant he was 11.

When he was finally allowed to see Noctis, he looked more fragile than usual in the large bed of his but mostly Ignis thought he looked bored. 

Each day he tried to stay by Noctis's side, sometimes he'd have to be pulled away for lessons but he knew being in Noctis's room was more important. He read books, played some games, sat around as the prince napped, anything to help make Noctis smile again. Regardless, whatever he did, he could still see the prince looking at his window and looking frustrated, could sense Noctis bottling himself up more than before. It was something hard to take in at 11, his only real friend changing in ways he couldn't fully comprehend. It was a couple of weeks of this and Ignis realized he hadn't thought about the Crownsguard once since the attack and he chided himself that he'd gotten distracted by someone else. It was more apparent now that Noctis getting hurt or dying was a real reality and one day it'll be his job to protect him. The next time he saw the guard he merely gave a polite 'good afternoon' and went to show Noctis a new book he'd gotten from his uncle. 

Later, Noctis is moved to Tenebrae and Ignis stays in Insomnia. Later, he finds out the Crownsguard died in the attack and Ignis learns more than what a crush feels like, he learns the nature of being a Crownsguard.

\---

When Ignis first meets Gladio, Ignis is 15. He knows Gladio and Noctis have been training for a while but it was the first time he'd managed to make his own schedule match up to meet the instructor. Since Noctis became well enough, Ignis's uncle pushed for his tutoring to get more advanced, for his curriculum to start new, specific topics. They mostly focused on politics, maths, some philosophy as well as history. Now and then he had his own training but he'd train with another member of the Crownsguard or sometimes Cor Leonis would make an appearance to give a few pointers. 

His first impression of Gladio is this: tall, strong, awful haircut, sweaty and looking jokingly smug down at a knocked down Noctis. 

Ignis can see Noctis isn't happy about his defeat and Ignis tries to stop himself from chuckling at the sulking expression on the future king's face. Gladio looks up in that moment and flashes a grin and Ignis can't help but give a small smile back. 

From that day on, Ignis tries to make more time in his schedule to meet up with Noctis at the end of his training sessions and sometimes he'd even get to have a round with Gladio. Which, he was rarely actually dressed for such a thing but it was fun in it's own way and Noctis seemed content to sit to the side and watch, probably cheering on Ignis just so Gladio could lose. Usually, after these sessions, Noctis would complain about Gladio being 'annoying' and 'strict' and 'unfair' and Ignis would chide him that Iris would be upset if she heard him speak like that about her brother. After one particularly stressful day he merely told Noctis that sometimes respect was something that needed to be earned and not won through brute strength. 

Sometimes in the car he wonders if Gladiolus would ever go for him but he chides himself on that line of thought and finally decides upon the fact that it wouldn't even matter. Gladio probably would want a cute girlfriend soon enough and Ignis wasn't going to let himself get too attached beyond a couple of small fantasies here and there. It's just another crush but he knows they go away. 

Later that year, Noctis begins secondary education and Ignis starts being taught how to drive.

\---

At 16, Ignis meets Prompto for the first time and he's cute but there isn't a spark like he's had with others. 

Maybe it's the fact it's Noctis's first friend outside anything to do with his royal bloodline and to Ignis that friendship is something precious he wants to protect. He gets reminders of how Noctis was after the attack by Marilith as well as the attack at Tenebrae and he hated how the prince moved further away from him. Now though, he'd made a new friend his age, that seems to like him for who he is rather than what he is and Ignis silently gives thanks to Prompto for being himself. It's not hard to see Noctis changing ever so slightly and perhaps it's maturity as well as Prompto's gentle but fun personality. 

Not to say that he doesn't wish he was the one doing these things instead of Prompto, but he's now sitting in at councillor meetings, getting more intensive studies to prepare him for degree level courses and he knows he can't fall behind. His uncle has great hopes for him and seems proud whenever they meet in the citadel but Ignis knows that if he fucks up it'll probably ruin everything. He knows he won't though, he's got a duty to not fuck up for the sake of the Lucis Caelum family and Noctis.

Still, he tries to get involved with Prompto and Noctis's free time whenever possible. Prompto seemed unsure about him at first but all it really took was Ignis picking them up in one of the nicer cars he was allowed to drive and Prompto tells him that he's 'super cool.' It makes Ignis feel more pride than it should and later Prompto digs into a meal Ignis had prepared for the three of them and it's a nice change to get some vocal validation no matter how dramatic Prompto is.

Overall, Prompto is a nice addition as Ignis was beginning to wonder if Noctis would ever smile properly again and he's glad he's proved wrong. 

What he never mentions at 16 is his small crush on King Regis but Ignis is pretty sure everyone has the same crush and Noctis would never forgive him for saying that.

\---

At 17, Ignis notices how much Gladiolus has changed and it almost seems unfair so he starts changing his own hairstyle. It's not just that, he was having issues even with his busy schedule to slot in styling his hair so he just left it down to give himself more time in the morning for some Ebony. The fact that Noctis had fully moved out of the citadel and had his own apartment somehow made him busier as 'house cleaner' and 'part time chef' were clearly being added to his job description. Sure it's not like he had to but Ignis knows that's a lie and he has to because Prompto wasn't going to do it and Gladio was busy with his regular job and being a full time big brother. 

So, sure, he didn't have to clean up after Noct or try and get him to eat a healthier meal but as the future kings adviser he'd be failing in his duties. 

And, honestly, Ignis hated being bored. Boredom led to other things like inappropriate distractions and he'd rather be focused on the important things than let his mind wonder too much. Most nights he was too tired to do anything more than shower and sleep and it was probably for the best. It left him little time to dwell on comparing his teenage existence to Prompto and Noctis's which he knows he's gone down that path before and ended up with feelings he didn't want. Sometimes, if the thoughts do arrive, he just has to remind himself of how Noctis looked after the attacks and think about how important he's become in the training of the future king. Sometimes he lets the thoughts take hold and he wonders what it'd be like if he'd gone to a regular school, wonders if he'd made other friends, if he'd gotten a boyfriend by now or his first kiss. He wonders what it's like to casually hang out with Noctis and Prompto at the arcade without worrying about his schedule or the fact anyone could attack Noctis there. 

Sometimes, he just jerks off to thoughts of Gladio and flops on his side to sleep after cleaning himself with a tissue. 

\---

Ignis is at the cusp of being 18 when Noctis is grabs some fizzy drink out of his fridge and casually mentions that it's Ignis's birthday soon and that he wants to do something for it. Ignis at said moment has his laptop out on his knees while on the sofa, Prompto nearby looking up from his phone at the sound of Noct's voice. Ignis can't really figure out what to say, especially when Prompto starts chiming in that Ignis never let's them do anything for his birthdays and that 18 was a special one, that he was officially going to be an adult. Ignis just sighs and rubs at his eyes a little, moving his glasses to clean them before replying smoothly he's been an 'adult' since he was 15. Noctis just snorts in return and Prompto frowns. 

Eventually Ignis sighs and shuts his laptop, clearly too late to try and get any work done now. He gets up to make himself a new cup of Ebony and as the kettle sounds through out the apartment he quietly states that 'as long as it wasn't too extravagant or dangerous' that he'd go with their plans. 

He stares down into the black liquid as he hopes that Noctis and Prompto combined have the sense to just get him a cake and surprise him one evening with some party poppers but the grins on his friends faces tells him otherwise. 

He hears Prompto call up Gladio and tells him to keep Ignis's birthday free or else. 

\---

His 18th birthday starts out like any normal day. He gets dressed, tries to style his hair a little but mostly makes himself some Ebony before heading out to drop Noctis and Prompto at school. Prompto had practically moved in at this point and Ignis was actually a little grateful as Noctis seemed to dislike having such a large apartment to himself. Once he had those two dropped (Noctis tells Ignis to keep his evening free and Ignis replies with 'where would I even go?') he heads to the citidel to begin a day of sitting in at meetings, a little bit of training with whoever is available and some further studies of the cities defenses. 

Sometimes someone he knows will wish him a happy birthday but there's not much else. His Uncle visits at some point in the day to gift him with a necklace that once belonged to this mother and he takes it with a precious touch and feels his eyes get ever so slightly wet. 

Later, as he's leaving a meeting, King Regis even gives him a passing happy birthday and it dawns on Ignis that this truly is an important day and something to be celebrated. He meets up with Gladiolus perfectly on time inside the citadels carpark and he's feeling a little giddy as he picks up Noct and Prompto from school, wondering just what his friends have planned. It truly warms him as he sees Prompto and Noctis conspiring in the back, that people are caring about him like this, that as stressed as he sometimes felt, he wouldn't change his life if offered to start again.

Or well, he thinks that until he actually finds out what the young princes plans are and he'd rather actually start life again than to deal with anyone finding out about it.

\---

Noctis and Prompt are changed out of their uniforms as they come back down to Ignis's car, grinning as they tell Ignis an address but not what they're actually going to be doing. As good as Prompto has been for Noctis, Ignis slightly resents how clearly Prompto has becomes the princes closer confidant but thoughts like that were quickly snubbed out. Plus he was distracted a little waiting in the car as Gladio had chosen to just take off his shirt and wear his tank top underneath to give himself a new, very distracting look. Ignis feels a slight warmth in his chest as he sees that Gladio has already started getting his tattoo done which he'd lovingly showed the initial design to Ignis weeks back. 

Ignis rolls down the window and tries to avoid staring too much and is thankful when Prompto has figured out the route on his phone and they set off.

As he drives he hopes that they've just booked some kind of restaurant, or a karaoke booth, a bowling alley lane, anything relatively safe and frankly, wholesome. As much as he likes the concept of kicking loose a little, to feel like his age, there were a couple of blocking factors. Firstly, he's still the future kings adviser and he was in charge of Noctis's wellbeing in these moments and secondly he doesn't really want to deal with Regis, Claurus and his uncle if things got too wild. 

He knows he'd take the blame for the evening if it does go wrong, he's always tried to take the blame away from Noctis when they were kids and it probably wasn't ever going to change.

As he parks where Prompto instructs him and sees that he's being guided towards a club, Ignis can only give the prince his best 'you're playing with fire' look and Noctis at least has the shame to look a bit sheepish. Prompto just laughs and tells Ignis to relax a little, that this place was for fancy VIP's like themselves and he knows a guy in school whose brother works the door and was gonna sneak Noct and Prompto in. 

Gladio looks a little surprised but gives a small chuckle and slaps Ignis on the back and tells him he's doing birthday shots. 

\---

At some point in the evening, Ignis finds his way to the bar by himself to order-- actually he just wants water he's decided seeing as he's only on shot 3 out of apparently 18. He's sure everyone will forget the count though or at least he hopes they do. 

Being in a club is, well, a quaint experience that Ignis can't help but analyze. He's seen clubs in the news, in tv shows, he knows the concepts and themes of them and purpose but visiting one himself seemed out of the question. Could he ever look anyone at the citadel in the eye if he'd ever sneaked off to do this without informing anyone? Informing Noct most of all? What a failure of an advisor and friend and honestly this club wasn't worth losing all that. If Ignis had to give a review it would mostly consist of saying it was too loud, too cramped, too expensive and annoyingly hot but the last thing may just be the alcohol flowing in his system that's a even newer sensation than the club. He can definitely feel it, his filter breaking down a little and probably why he's having such deep thoughts as he stares into the dancing crowd and light show, hears the music travel through the air and he doesn't know the song but tolerates it. 

He gets his water and instead of joining back up with the others in the booth they had taken over, he people watches. 

Isn't it funny? He rarely gets to watch regular people of Insomnia interact. Not that he's any different but he's grown up surrounded by the Crownsguard, by royalty, by scholars and councillors and these are all in professional environments. He's seen people on the street as he's driving, seen people as he's shopping but the interactions he's watching from his place at the bar are completely different, remind him of some books he's read on human psychology and human physiology. He's made to think about fantasies he's only given short amounts of time to in his life as he sees people moving in time with each other, with possessive grips and unrestrained affection or is it just lust? He sees couples kissing gently as well as violently, sees the bodies of women in little clothing for the first time outside of a picture and different types of men of all shapes and sizes. He wonders at what age did he decide some of these experiences were hopeless for him to wish for? It dawns on him as he sips the cold water that at some point he's condemned himself to voluntary celibacy and he wonders if he's okay with that but maybe it's just the shot talking and he has friends to return back to. 

Who needs all this shit when he's got the best friends in all of Lucis? 

\---

Later, he's shot 10 out of 18 and he's back at the bar again to get more water. He's been making sure Noctis and Prompto aren't getting too drunk and thankfully, Noctis admits that wasn't really their plan but then also admits that he just wanted to see Ignis 'wasted as fuck' and Ignis realizes he's fallen into a trap. 

He waits for his water but unlike last time someone starts to talk to him and he feels that familiar feeling again when he looks upon the guy that's clearly trying to get his attention. He feels a thrill at the fact someone is perhaps flirting with him and an even bigger thrill that the man is attractive and well built. He has dark hair, a couple of tattoos, some casual clothes on and a charming smile and Ignis feels flustered for once but mentally tries to blame it on the alcohol. The man leans in close to talk over the music and tells Ignis that he'd offer a drink but he'd rather just get to know him without any pretenses and Ignis feels like one of the fish that Noctis enjoys reeling up. 

They talk, Ignis being as vague as possible about his life, merely says he's an accounting student and he's impressed the lie slips off his tongue so easily. He feels the other mans mouth close to his ear as they talk and at some point he's moved them a little further from the bar and dance floor and Ignis wonders if his friends have noticed. He wonders if they would be happy for him to explore these new horizons or would feel annoyed at him for ditching them in favour of his own selfish desires. The other man makes a face and asks what's wrong and Ignis shakes his head and knows he's being rude which won't do. 

It only takes maybe 20 more minutes until Ignis is letting this stranger he barely knows kiss him and frankly he can't really say he regrets it. He's not that particularly good at it but the other man seems patient and good humoured and Ignis always had a knack for learning quickly.

His first make out session is cut short however by his phone going off with a text from Gladio telling him to come outside ASAP as Noctis was throwing up in the gutter and Ignis is off in an instant. 

He crouches down by the prince and offers some water, rubs his back and he scolds himself mentally for the situation and how he's handled the evening. He's always known that whenever he puts his needs first, Noctis is going to be the one to suffer and if he'd stuck around, maybe Noctis wouldn't have downed those last few shots waiting for him to return. He's sobering up a little as he sees how Noctis hates the state that he's in, hates puking in public like this and he tells Gladio to book a cab. Prompto helps bring Noctis into the car and Prompto tries to lighten the mood as they sit in the back by telling stores of the evening, that Ignis missed out and what was Ignis even doing? But he evades those questions to ask about details of the stories and he tries to not look at Gladio who is giving him a strange look. 

He's thankful when he ends up passed out on the sofa in Noct's apartment after safely putting the prince to bed with a bucket nearby, water and some painkillers. He drinks a bottle himself as he thinks about the evening and gives up at some point to just sleep.

Later he finds a business card in the strangers name in his back pocket but he never calls him.


	2. Thyme

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another adventure into writing shit at stupid times of the night. Anyway! Chapter 2/the end! As it's following events of the game, all the spoilers are here and it takes on a bit more of a sadder turn than the first chapter that's mostly hijinks. I hope this chapter at least makes sense. If you wanna discuss anything, feel free to DM me at @gulpereelcos on twitter or leave a comment!~

It's about 2 months after the whole 18th birthday debacle and Ignis is training with Gladio. 

Sometimes there was a slot in Ignis's busy schedule to indulge in a short session with the other man and it's something he wished he could make more time for. Training with Gladio was actually helpful but it was a more relaxed environment than his usual sessions with other instructors, a more laid back affair. He didn't feel completely embarrassed if he fucked up (just a little embarrassed) and the only audience they sometimes had was Noctis playing a fishing game on his phone as he waited for Ignis to drive him somewhere.

This training session was just him and Gladio and Ignis liked these sessions the most.

He's not stupid, he's well aware he still has a dumb crush on the other man but it's not like Ignis would ever let that get in the way of work. It was just sometimes nice to feel Gladio against him in hand-to-hand or to receive a grin and a wink from the other man when Ignis did something particularly fancy with a polearm. It's just a small crush that's ended up directed towards Gladio because he's attractive (so much more since he first met him somehow), closer to his age and more importantly not someone he actually has to answer to for work. He let's himself have this indulgence. 

Gladio knocks down Ignis to the floor before dropping 'I saw you at the bar, with a guy,' and Ignis then curses his forgetful self that always knows indulgences always bite him back in the ass. 

Well, he's a professional at keeping a poker face so he merely just tries to look vaguely annoyed that he's on his back on the floor rather than betray any panic. 

"And?" He asks the slightly uncomfortable silence after a few moments. 

"I just wanted to talk about it, you keep a lot of shit to yourself," Gladio replies back in the understatement of the decade and he reaches down to offer a hand to bring Ignis back up. Ignis takes it and hopes Gladio assumes his slightly sweaty hands and flushed ears are due to the training. 

"What is there to talk about? I was drunk, he was interested, then Noct was throwing up."

"I just, I wasn't expecting it."

"You're going to need to be more specific," and Gladio makes a face and Ignis knows the other man is good with words but is still only a year older than him.

"I was just surprised you went for that kind of guy, okay. I thought you'd go for someone... more Noct like."

"If you're trying to imply what I think you're trying to, it's never been like that. Gods, Gladio, I've known him since I was 8," and Ignis is turning away to head towards his water, if only to give himself something to do than to look at Gladio's reactions. "Look, it was just a drunken mistake, I didn't mean for it to happen, it was unprofessional and there's really no meaning beyond the guy that I made out with beyond the fact he was there." Which Ignis knows is a lie, he remembers seeing the tattoo sleeves on the other man, the built nature to him that made him remember his jerk off fantasies in the past recent years. 

"He looked a little like me," and Ignis curses the fact that Gladiolus is both brawn and brain. 

"Yes, well, let's not read too much into it. There's a lot of men that look like you."

"Was it your first kiss?" And trust Gladio to throw him completely for a loop in a conversation, to ask a question that makes him nearly choke a little on the water he's drinking. Ignis decides to look at Gladio directly and it's a mistake as Ignis can't even figure out the look he's being given. 

"If I say it was?"

"I'll be annoyed if you say it was."

"What?" Ignis hates that the conversation is making him sound so stupid but also, what?

"Your first kiss," Gladio starts, and he looks to the side a little, looks a little embarrassed, "I wanted to give it to you."

Ignis actually does choke on the water this time.

\---

Somehow they manage a whole year of not being discovered until one evening Noctis walks in with Prompto complaining about wanting take out and Ignis has his vest half unbuttoned and Gladio has his shirt off and they're definitely in the middle of something. 

The two young boys pause for a few seconds before Noctis grins and tells Prompto he's lost the bet and dinner is on him tonight and they're gone as fast as they had come in. Noctis shuts the door with a parting statement of 'congrats but we're pretty hungry so uh, could you hurry it up?' and Ignis pulls away from Gladio to rub at his slightly red face and adjusts his glasses to give Gladio a small glare that falters from the slightly bashful grin he gets in return. 

Ten minutes later, Ignis is out and driving them to dinner much to Gladio's disappointment but the shield knows he's just the boyfriend and Noctis is Ignis's life. 

Still, it's cute to watch Ignis look embarrassed as he drives, trying to avoid every topic but the elephant in the room. Perhaps Noctis does have some princely qualities to him in that he has the decorum to not bring it up while stuffing his face with a burger. 

\---

Ignis hits 21 and thinks 'I'm happy with my life.' 

There's things he's not so happy about but some of those things are just beyond his control at the moment. He can't fix the fact that King Regis looks older every month, can't fix the frowns that Noctis casts at his father sometimes because of it. He can't fix the political situation that's starting to stir a little more, can't really give any solutions beyond text book answers to certain attacks. He can't stop news of monsters attacking people more often than before, he's just one man that has a firm place in the citadel than on the field like the Kingsglaive. He knows what he can't do but he knows he's just human. 

Beyond all of that, he's happy. 

\---

At 22 years old, Ignis surveys Noctis's now packed up apartment and it hits that change was happening. 

Of course it was, Ignis chastises himself, nothing lasts forever, but the feeling when it hits makes him take a moment to just stare into his cup of Ebony. Soon they'll be driving off into the unknown and he knows he's only fucked himself over by not considering what everything meant more closely. This life he'd grown accustomed to was going to change and it was going to change for everyone else too. Briefly he thinks it would've been nice to just have one more year in this comfortable arrangement but that's a selfish request and the city of Insomnia depends on him more than he realizes. Perhaps, changing up this comfortable life would be a good thing, perhaps he's grown too complacent and this push to change his life is just what he needs. 

It's all a little too real, looking at the boxes of packed up comics and junk. Noctis is going to marry Lunafreya and Ignis wonders if the prince has even considered it or if he's going to feel the same impact Ignis is now feeling as he's fitted into ceremonial clothes. He'll try his best to make Noctis consider it more on the trip but maybe it's just human nature to ignore things until it actually happens, actually slaps you in the face. After all, with Noct and Lunafreya getting married, his own life will change too and Ignis isn't even sure what direction it'll take. 

Right now his job is basically a butler, bodyguard, caretaker, tutor, friend and chef to the crown prince. It's nearly always been that but new people will be taking on some of these roles after the marriage, after Noctis becomes king. He won't have to be a chef anymore (unless Noct is being fussy which he probably will be), he won't need a tutor or a caretaker, he'll be a bodyguard among many and well, there are people hired as butlers to do that job. He'll definitely still be a friend but they'll probably both become busier and the friendship they've had will evolve into something more mature. Ignis sips his Ebony and realizes that's he's not even sure what job he'll be coming back to after everything - will he become an advisor to the king? An attendant like his uncle? What about Prompto and Gladiolus? He realizes he's never asked what their plans were though he assumes it's something Crownsguard related. Maybe that'll be his direction too. 

Gladio comes into the room and tells him that he's thinking too loudly, gives him a quick kiss on the cheek and tells him that Noct needs help with packing some clothes. 

\---

When Ignis hands over the newspaper to Gladio, he's 22 and is struck with a memory from when he was 17, a conversation with King Regis. 

He'd ended up with some free time that day, Noctis was at school and he'd finished his lessons early giving him at least an hour to do what he wanted. He'd ended up sitting in the library with a basic meal composed of a bag of crisps, an apple and he knows he shouldn't really be eating in the royal library but he felt comfortable there. It was nice, to sit and read a book recommended by Gladio, taking a bite of something now and then. Perhaps he was too comfortable - King Regis appeared right next to him and he most definitely didn't make an undignified surprised sound. 

The King merely chuckled and Ignis could feel his ears grow a little hot. 

Ignis, however, was still somewhat professional at 17 and asked if the King needed any help with anything, needed a book and Regis just shook his head, took a seat next to him. 

"I want to talk about the future." 

And Ignis listened.

\--- 

As Ignis looks over towards the city of Altissia that the boat is fast approaching, he thinks that maybe things are starting to look up.

Since leaving the city, calling what's been happening a clusterfuck is an understatement and he's been a mixture of angry and devastated since the news struck about Insomnia. He was expecting change in his life but he never wanted anything this dramatic, this intense and fucked up. Ignis had always been dreading the day he'd have to comfort Noct over the death of his father but to couple it with everything else, Ignis didn't even know where to begin. On top of that, Gladio had gone off, returned with some unexplained injuries and Ignis hadn't even gotten time to shout at him for it as Iris always seemed around the corner. Paired with the very uneven odds of four barely adult men against a whole military nation, Ignis is pretty sure he's seeing premature signs of aging. 

Still, if you ignore all that, there's some good things. 

It's not like he isn't enjoying the time spent with his friends, with Iris and Cindy and Cid and all the new people they've met. He's enjoying exploring a world unknown in a way that's pure and visceral, enjoying the time spent driving down new roads and paths, seeing creatures he's only seen in books or short video clips. He's learning new recipes and tasting new ingredients, learning new fighting techniques and sides to his friends he never knew. 

He's becoming even closer to Gladio, the tent just a little too small but works as a great excuse to move in closer to the other man during the colder nights. He hates that he hasn't been able to get an explanation for the disappearance yet but he understands that as much as they're together, space is important too sometimes. He's talking more with Prompto recently too, looking over his photos in the evening and Ignis is kind enough to not comment on the fact that Prompto was taking more of Noctis than anyone else. He's becoming closer to Noct but Ignis wonders if it's due to the close nature of this journey or the fact their job roles mean nothing for the time being. 

It's these little things that Ignis tries to think about to distract him from all the bad that's happened in such a short span of time but as he sees the entrance to Altissia he lets a little bit of optimism sneak in. 

As the boat glides into the beautiful city of water, Ignis considers hope. 

\---

The night before the Leviathan summoning, Noct and Prompto leave the hotel room with plans to explore the city night life and Gladio and Ignis are left with the luxury room to themselves. 

Ignis had tried to argue about them going off when things were so tense but Prompto just gave him the kicked puppy look and asked if Ignis trusted him and Gladio was also giving him a look too that was saying 'what are you doing?' So Ignis conceded. 

After the two younger members of the party were gone, Gladio chuckles at the fact he's basically jut gotten permission from the King to fuck his boyfriend and Ignis ends up laughing too. 

Later, after a bath together, they fuck but Ignis wonders if the term 'make love' would be more appropriate but he'd always be too embarrassed to say those words out loud. It's been ages since they'd gone beyond handjobs, blowjobs, anything that didn't require more preparation than a few tissues. Privacy wasn't really the issue, it was more to do with tiredness, that they had spent the day in some kind of sewer or mine and they could do something beyond some deep, lazy kisses but actually sleep sounded better. 

The night before Leviathan was different, they felt rested for once and they took the opportunity to take their time. Ignis wishes he had Prompto's camera for a few moments that night, wished he could capture the way Gladio looked at him, at the way the city lights bloomed into the dimmed room from their slightly opened window. He can hear the soft sounds of Altissia's buskers and smells the ocean as he lets himself be laid bare on the soft bed that reminds him of home and he wraps his arms around the man that shares the same burdens and then some. His fingers trace the feathers of a bird of prey as he wonders if what will be his punishment for this indulgence and wonders if he even cares when this indulgence is what he's needed for a long time. It's not just sex in the end and Ignis can pretend his eyes are a little wet due to pleasure and not the fact he's finally letting go a little and letting reality crash upon him. 

Things have changed but he feels like he can face it as he meets Gladiolus's darkened eyes, squeezes his hand. 

\---

Briefly, Ignis thinks 'fuck' as he looks upon the chaos and then he doesn't think about anything at all for a while.

\---

"I'll be putting a lot of burden on Noctis, on you," King Regis tells a 17 year old Ignis in the royal library. Ignis stays quiet, letting his king speak. "In the future, things may get rough, Ignis, but-" the king pauses, "well, it may seem useless to say it now, but things will get better no matter what."

"Is something going to happen?" And Ignis feels young asking it but there's suddenly a creeping fear in his gut. 

"Things happen all the time," Regis replies with a small self deprecating smile, "but I'm not talking to you about it to scare you or anything. I just want you to be prepared for the future, that's all. If you're prepared for the future to change, perhaps Noctis will be too." 

"I'm just his advisor."

"Ignis, we both know that's a lie," Regis raises his eyebrow a little and Ignis wants to bury himself in the fact that he did just actually lie to the King but it seems to mostly amuse Regis than anger him. "You're a good friend to him, and a good influence. When Noct takes the throne, I'd be pleased if you stayed by his side, gods knows he'll need it."

"Of course I'll stay by his side," Ignis replies quickly back, not quite a shout but definitely a little offended that the King thinks he wouldn't. 

"That's the spirit," Regis smiles more sincerely, starts to get up from the chair slowly. "Just , if times seem rough, humanity has always made it through, remember that. It's why we're still here, it's why Insomnia stands strong. Noctis will depend on you in the future, you'll need hope to inspire his own. Someday you're going to have to shake some sense into him, to shout at him," Ignis notices Regis looks a little nostalgic, "but you need that sense of fire in you first."

"Even if I shouted at him, I don't think Noct will listen," Ignis replies after a moment, letting the words he feels are important sink into his conscious even if he's not 100% sure he understands. 

"Oh, don't worry, he will if it's you."

\---

He shouts at all of them, after the fight with the Marlboro. 

Ignis is 22 and has lost his eyesight and Lunafreya is dead and everything feels more impossible than before but damnit Regis was right. He can't let his own fire go out, not when there's people depending on him to be the one to sort everything out. Noctis needs him, Prompto needs him, Gladio won't admit he does right now but he does and Ignis has had enough of the atmosphere between them all. 

Life changes, for the better or the worse and he accepts that he's getting the short end of the stick in life but at least he's still alive. At least it's only his eyesight taken away from him, that everyone is safe is a blessing even if everyone is in a shitty, sour mood and are taking it out on each other using him as an excuse. 

He shouts at them and eventually he thinks they get somewhere. 

\---

Prompto goes missing and as much as Noctis has the right to be upset about it, there's not much they can do at that point in time on the train. 

He's upset about it too but before he starts to wonder if he'd been able to prevent it if he'd been able to see, he stops himself as it's a dangerous line of thought. 

Things will happen. 

\---

They lose Noctis and the Regalia and Ignis wonders if the Gods have it out for him.

Later they find Prompto and he thanks said Gods for the fact that his friend is pretty much fine beyond a few cuts and bruises but later takes it all back when he realizes the deeper wounds are in places Ignis can't touch, deep inside Prompto's heart and mind. 

\---

Ignis is 22 when Noctis runs towards the elevator and Ignis has his hands full of things attacking left, right and center. 

Perhaps he should've shouted something more meaningful before Noctis left for the crystal but maybe it was better off that he didn't, Noctis needed firm resolve and perhaps it was the last gift Ignis could give at that moment. 

\---

It takes a few months but eventually the sun goes down permanently and Ignis kinda wishes he'd been able to see the last sunset but Gladio tells him it's nothing special when he asks.

He guesses Gladio is just saying that but doesn't mention it.

\---

Ignis is 24 when Gladio first leaves him to go solo. 

It's not forever, Gladio explained, just they need some help outside of Lestallum setting up some outposts and lights for hunters. Ignis knows Gladio is mostly going because Iris wants to go and he's still got a big brother streak even in the apocalypse, even if Aranea is among them. He tells Ignis they'll maybe be a few weeks, maybe a couple of months and tells him not to worry, that he'll send a text if he can now and then. He tells Ignis that he'll miss his cooking most of all and that Ignis better make his favourites when he returns. 

As Gladio kisses him goodbye he feels loneliness he's never felt before and it hits that this will just be reality now, that the world is changing again. Of course he knows that they can't all stay by each other during this time, that they'll need to do other things, Prompto already had left to help out at Hammerhead. He knows that duty now meant helping the survival of humanity and it was a heavy burden but something they all had to step up to while their King was away. Ignis knows all that, but it still hurts as he realizes he's never felt this kind of loneliness in his life until now.

He decides to distract himself and perhaps, through the distraction, better himself. 

\---

Cor Leonis stayed in the city of Lestallum as it's guardian and eventually, Ignis's temporary teacher. 

Ignis had gone to him after Gladio had left and Cor had taken a look at Ignis and merely stated that 'life's pretty shit sometimes, yeah?' and Ignis can feel their relationship is different to how it once was.

Back then, growing up in the citadel, Cor was the famed Marshal, a man that would sometimes come into his training sessions and make his palms sweat a little. He was a man he wanted praise from, to impress and sometimes even copy. The man was a mystery and spoke only when he needed to and often not a lot of words but Ignis always felt like he could trust him and hoped one day he'd be as good as him in the Crownsguard. Even after the fall of Insomnia, Ignis had had no real time to know the other man as there had been so much to do in little time. 

Now, the Marshal is still a man of mystery but Ignis can tell he's not being treated as a child anymore. Cor doesn't hide his more cynical nature and Ignis likes him more for it, likes that Cor doesn't dance around his blindness but merely puts forward some ways to work around it. 

Ignis trains with him while Gladio is gone and it makes him feel less useless in this new hellscape of a world. 

\---

It's 6 months and Gladio still isn't back and he shares a couple of bottles of wine with Cor and ends up sleeping beside him but nothing really else. He guesses that he appreciates the weight of another person in the same bed that's been empty for too long and wonders if he could see himself doing anything more with Cor but he can't see it and doesn't dwell on it.

Perhaps the apocalypse just takes the sex drive out of people, Ignis can't be sure what it is. 

\---

Gladiolus comes back and Ignis concludes that actually, his sex drive was still perfectly intact even after everything and he shows exactly how intact it is to Gladio the entire week. 

On one particular day, Gladio takes a moment to go slow, to open up Ignis with tender touches and Ignis feels his eyes go wet as he realizes how important the people around him are. He thinks about how it's been nearly 3 years with no sign of Noctis and that each year will be the same unknowing future but at least he has people to experience this unknown with. Gladio kisses him deep and roughly but his hands touch the scares on his body like glass and Ignis would be annoyed if he didn't realize that Gladio needed this moment, that he was probably giving the same touches back. 

He thinks back to the night before the Leviathan summoning and he wonders if Gladio is giving him the same looks or are they even more deep than before? He can imagine that night in his head still, the warm, dim light bathing them and the sounds and smells of the ocean, of music and gentle laughing. He can remember each line of Gladio's tattoo and he traces his hands over where he knows a beak is, where feathers begin and start. He thanks the world that he still has his memories even if it's taken away his sight and the touches he receives from Gladio feel heightened, feel more real. Later they lie in the dim room entangled together and Gladio laments to Ignis about missing his cooking and Ignis appreciates his attempt at lightening the mood. 

Later in the week, as everyone discusses future plans, Ignis tells him that he wants to join in, that he's stronger now, he's been training. Aranea can see Gladio start to open his mouth and she cuts in saying that more hands is nothing to say no to, that she won't stop whatever Ignis wishes to do. 

He thanks Cor and a few weeks later he's jumping into the back of a truck.

\---

Ignis is 27 when Gladio turns to him and tells them that they should get married. 

It's in the middle of dinner and it's a rare moment when everyone is around and they hold their breath until Ignis just shrugs and agrees that they should and Prompto shouts out that Cindy owes him 200 gil.

\---

It's not really a wedding but Gladio shares his last cup noodle (Ignis questions out loud if this is still edible) with him and Dino makes them rings and Ignis realizes it's been 5 years since Noctis disappeared. 

\---

Ignis is 32 when Noctis comes back and it almost felt like he'd forgotten that this was the moment he was waiting for.

He wishes for the first time in a while that he could see. He wants to be able to see how much older Noctis probably looks, he wants to see his friend look every inch the proud king that Ignis can tell he now is. It's been a long, long journey to this but Ignis can take pride that he's helped Noctis get to this moment, can hope that Regis is looking down upon them in approval. He thinks back to Regis talking about the future, about burdens and Ignis thinks that perhaps they all have been given a burden far beyond what was expected but Noctis even more so. It dawns on him that even with a warning about the future there was no way he was truly prepared and in the caravan the reality hits hard. 

In the slightly dark mood between them all, Prompto mentions that Noct is all hairy and Ignis laughs a little in the caravan, reaches over tentatively and Noct let's him map his face if only because Ignis needs more firm proof that he's there.

They spend the night together like before and no one really brings up what everyone is thinking as it'll make everything just a little too real, a little too depressing. Ignis can tell Noctis wants them to leave on a high note, on some joking comments here and there as Ignis makes them all dinner for the first time in 10 years. Nostalgia hits him and even if Noctis has been gone for such a long time, suddenly everything clicks back into place like he'd never left and he wonders if he's strong enough to let the true final battle begin. 

He's used to the darkness, he's 32 now, the apocalypse is just a part of life. Was getting daylight back worth giving up all this again? It's stupid but the thought genuinely crosses his mind and he's sure it crosses the others too but they all have a duty they can't ignore. It drives home even further when later he's putting on the Crownsguard uniform and he wishes he could see himself and everyone else in these outfits they were fated to wear. In another timeline, he'd already be in the uniform, working along side Prompto and Gladiolus, acting as the King's most trusted companions and advisors, guarding him and Lunafreya. He wonders if Noctis would've had a heir by now and if he'd be just as a nightmare as a young Noctis had been. 

They drive to Insomnia. 

\---

Ignis is 32 when he feels the sun rise for the first time in 10 years. 

He can feel the gentle warmth return to the land, can sense the light on his eyelids. He sits on the stairs that once lead to his home and lets Gladio and Prompto join his side. He feels Prompto cry into his shoulder, feels Gladio squeeze his hand tighter than ever before. 

Ignis hopes the 21 years Noctis had with them were good, that he entered the throne room with no regrets. He starts to feel himself break down a little as it hits him that truly the time spent with his friends and Noctis was the most precious and delicate thing to exist in the world, not some crystal. He wonders if he'd have behaved differently if he'd known everything was going to come to this but knowing the future is dangerous and he knows that Noctis wouldn't change the past. He'd still want to spend his time laughing with them all, avoiding vegetables, playing hooky in an arcade, fishing without a care in the world. 

He sits in somewhat silence with his companions as he tries to think about the future, that the world is going through another big change and he's right in the middle of it all. Ignis knows a chapter of his life is closing but he also can feel a new one opening and as much as it's tinged with sadness, the pages of the book feel clean and welcoming. 

Ignis feels hope.


End file.
